January 5th, 2019 Washington, DC: White House chief of staff Mick Mulvaney announced a new program to assist federal employees impacted by the partial government shutdown. His… Read more “White House Announces Plan For Shutdown ‘Payday Loans’ To Federal Workers To Pay For Border Wall.”
Trump Accuses Santa Of Controlling The Deep State
December 25th, 2018 Washington, DC: President Trump has accused legendary goodwill toy maker Santa Claus of being in control of the so-called ‘Deep State’ and… Read more “Trump Accuses Santa Of Controlling The Deep State”
President Trump Taps Swamp Thing For White House Chief Of Staff
December 11th, 2018 Washington, DC: In a surprise press release today, the white house informed the world that President Trump has chosen the Swamp Thing as… Read more “President Trump Taps Swamp Thing For White House Chief Of Staff”
Martian Great Leader Condemns “Attack” On His Planet
November 27th, 2018 Pasadena, California: Flight controllers at NASA’s Jet Propulsion lab yesterday leaped into the air and celebrated wildly as NASA’s Mars InSight probe landed successfully… Read more “Martian Great Leader Condemns “Attack” On His Planet”
President Trump Pardoned By ‘Mueller.’
November 22nd, 2018 Washington, DC: President Trump awoke early this am convinced that he had received a complete exoneration of any possible federal or state charges whatsoever.… Read more “President Trump Pardoned By ‘Mueller.’”
President Trump Blames Increase In Deadly Wild Fires On Smokey Bear And Too Many Trees
November 18th, 2018 Point Dume, Malibu, California: While visiting the devastation wrought by wildfires in California yesterday, President Trump lashed out at those whom he said were… Read more “President Trump Blames Increase In Deadly Wild Fires On Smokey Bear And Too Many Trees”
White House To Use Moscow Temp Agency Amid Staffing Crisis
November 14th, 2018 Washington, DC: The White House released a press statement this morning announcing that because of a very high turnover in staffing, it will begin… Read more “White House To Use Moscow Temp Agency Amid Staffing Crisis”
President Trump Awards Medal Of Freedom To Dr Evil
November 12th, 2018 Washington, DC: President Trump today announced that he has awarded the nations highest civilian honor, the Presidential Medal Of Freedom, to his biggest… Read more “President Trump Awards Medal Of Freedom To Dr Evil”
Pat Robertson Promises The Ten Plagues Of Egypt If Democrats Win The House.
November 6th, 2018 Fort Wayne, Indiana: While on the campaign trail today, President Trump was joined on stage by 700 club host, and former GOP candidate… Read more “Pat Robertson Promises The Ten Plagues Of Egypt If Democrats Win The House.”