October 21st, 2018
Washington, DC: Pulitzer Prize award winner for journalism, RFN reporter Andy Mocksham, returned to his cherished correspondent duty this past week. His first assignment was based on a tip from several whistle-blowers inside the Federal Reserve, Dept of the Treasury and the White House itself.
Concerned by the ballooning deficit created by last years tax reform bill, the White House signed an executive order that would use the multi-colored currency from President Trumps now discontinued board game to pay down the national debt.
RFN reporter Andy Mocksham contacted the President on his still unsecured galaxy smartphone and asked him a few questions about the new Executive order, and how it will affect the deficit.
When asked why he would want to use fake currency from his defunct board game to buy down the federal deficit, Trump responded;
“That’s a great question Andy, I can’t understand why the rest of the fake news completely misses the stories that you dig into so bigly.”
“You are the best. I’m glad your hand is better.”
“Here is the deal. I needed those humongous tax breaks last year. Truth is that no matter how much I pilfer from the tax coffers by golfing every weekend, I’m still going broke. For some reason, those tax breaks are also making the country go broke.”
“I’m not an economist Andy, I’m a frustrated game show host. I would have been much happier as the host of Hollywood Squares or Wheel of Fortune, but I missed those opportunities by choosing the Apprentice and then putting all my effort behind my amazing board game.”
“It was so much better than Monopoly.”
“No one wanted to buy either version of my tremendous game. I printed billions of Trump dollars for both versions but only sold a few hundred thousand. It was a bigly colossal failure Andy.”
“I have billions of Trump Game dollars left over to balance the federal budget. But everyone is telling me that I can’t use them.”
“I don’t understand why. Canada has an amazing economy and they have been using Monopoly money since the 1930’s”