February 21^st. 2017

Brussels, Belgium:  US Vice President Mike Pence met with EU leaders today and spoke in front of the EU Parliament in Brussels.

Pence spent most of his time meeting with various EU leaders listening to their apprehension of events inside the EU with the UK-BREXIT vote, US President Trumps negative rhetoric towards NATO, as well as his coziness with Russia.

Pence reassured the EU President, Antonio Tajani, that even though Donald Trump won the election and was inaugurated, Barack Obama was still running the country’s foreign policy behind the scenes in a “Shadow” government.

When grilled by RFN reporter Andy Mocksham, Pence said,

“Trump thinks he is running the show, but he doesn’t read anything but Breitbart and watches Fox News, so no way anyone will let him make important decisions. I don’t have any experience either, I’m basically a numskull.”

“The Nuclear football? Seriously?”

“They don’t let anyone in this administration within one square mile of that thing. The one the media shows people is a decoy.”

“Besides Mocksham, It’s not a Goddamn football. It’s a briefcase!

“You fake news people think that you are so damn smart”