April 7th, 2017
Near Earth Orbit: Military experts announced that the US has used its newly operational Death Star located in Earth orbit to attack a Syrian airbase. The Pentagon’s official statement is that the attack was a Tomahawk cruise missile strike.
RFN reporter Andy Mocksham was able to make contact with the Pentagons Missile Defense Agency director Dr Strangelove. When asked what all this means, Strangelove replied:
“MOCKSHAM! Vee now have zzzeeee…Ugh, aghk unhhh…Death Star. It iz…OPERATIONAL!”
“But vee cannot….Allow zis to become….ugh…aghk….known. So ze cruz mizzles will be blamed for ze…”
“ATTACK…Gah…Unnngh…Agghhh!!!! Hahaha…Haha…Hahaha…”
White House communications director Sean Spicer officially denied that the US had attacked Syria and accused the “Fake news media of fabricating the whole thing for ratings.”
The Real Fake News 