May 29^th, 2017

Detroit, Michigan:  One of the big three US truck manufacturers have announced that they will be offering a bumper sticker factory option for its conservative minded customers. The marketing departments of Chevrolet and GMC trucks have both decided that it will be a popular addition to an already long list of option packages made available to their loyal base of owners. Ford and Ram declined to comment on whether they will also offer a similar option.

RFN reporter Andy Mocksham was able to test drive a brand new Chevrolet Silverado with the new  ‘Base Patriot Sticker’ option applied to the back window and tailgate. He then met with the GM truck marketing guru who came up with the idea, Mr. Bubba Thick. Thick explained the reasoning behind the new sticker option:

“Mocksham, our marketing department has decades of statistics that show us that the majority of our truck owners live in the so-called ‘Red’ states and rural areas of the ‘Blue’ states. When we visit these areas we see our trucks just covered in conservative-themed bumper stickers.”

“We are going to allow our customers in those areas to have the option of purchasing their new Chevy and GM trucks with the various new ‘Patriot’ sticker options directly from the factory.”

“The top of the line in the option group will be the ‘Trump’ package that covers the entire truck with his now famous campaign stickers.”

“We are making American trucks great again!”

The Trump sticker package option: